If you are reading this and/or listening to this podcast, I want you to know: YOU ARE INCREDIBLE.
Working Moms. Single ladies. Exceptional partners! New moms! Solopreneurs! We are doing the things, ladies!
And it can be hard.
In the search for an exceptional and fulfilling career, our personal lives and relationships sometimes take a backseat. In an effort to be an example of a strong work ethic for our kids, we can push ourselves to the point of burnout. In a society that expects women to be a certain way, look a certain way, ACT a certain way – WHO WE ACTUALLY ARE gets lost.
When you read the podcast title “Work Hard, Mom Harder,” did you feel empowered, or defensive? Does it sound like a rally cry, or an indictment?
Recently I received some feedback from a mentor: The gist of it was “So many women are already working to the point of burnout. And you’re asking us to work harder?”
Allow me to be sooo clear. I DO NOT HAVE ALL THE ANSWERS.
BUT I BELIEVE IN MY SOUL THAT WE CAN HAVE IT ALL. A great relationship with our partner or spouse. Fulfilling friendships. We can do MEANINGFUL work. We can be present and enjoy our kids. We can contribute to society. We can do all the things, and not lose ourselves in the process. In fact – I believe that we will FIND ourselves in the process.
I recently had the opportunity to speak to a room full of women for the Walla Walla Valley Chamber of Commerce Women in Business luncheon. The title of my presentation was “Work Hard, Care Harder” and in it, I shared the three most important lessons I have learned so far on this crazy journey.
Over the next three podcast episodes, I’ll be sharing each of those lessons, going even deeper in each.
I have two kids in diapers. Huggies boxes of various shapes and sizes are a mainstay of my home décor at this point.
I have seen a Huggies box put to use as a race car. A spaceship. A canoe to float the Amazon river. A crib for Maddox’s giraffe baby.
The lesson I want to share with you today is: See Possibility in Everything.
The problem is that somewhere along the line, we stop seeing endless possibility in the Huggies box. We see that box and think DANG I GOTTA TAKE OUT THE RECYCLING.
We need to flex our creative muscles when faced with a problem. We need to use our imagination when we encounter obstacles!
I did not have a company handbook that told me I could bring my babies with me to work. My sister knew that she could design a career that better accommodated her mom-duties and her desire to impact her community. We saw TWO THINGS that we wanted, and asked “What would it look like to have both?” And almost as importantly, “Wouldn’t it be fun if…?”
Do you want to go back to school? Grow your side-hustle? Get the promotion? Are you bumping into a problem with a project at work? Are you struggling to break through in your relationship with your partner, or your communication with your family?
To make this stick in your life, start asking questions like these:
When faced with a decision, instead of “Option A” or “Option B” – ask yourself, “What would it look like to have both?”
When you encounter a problem that needs solving, instead of “How have other people done it?” ASK yourself, “Wouldn’t it be fun if…”
The next time you have to have a tough conversation, whether it be with an employee, employer, a friend or your Mom, instead of “How do I get through this as quickly as possible?” try this instead: “What is the best outcome I can imagine from this interaction?”
I call these “Imagination Questions” and they force you to get out of your default mode. Write them down in your favorite personal development journal.
What would it look like to have both?
Wouldn’t it be fun if…
What is the best outcome
I can imagine…
Forget what people SHOULD do, what the rulebook says, and get creative. Get imaginative. Look at the box and see a racecar. SEE POSSIBILITY IN EVERYTHING!